Bad Day

I haven't had too many bad days lately. Everything has been stable and imperfectly-perfect. I have been coping with the things that don't go right, and life was going great. But when I woke up this morning I had a sinking feeling brought on by the thought of Olive's upcomming surgery. No matter how many times I go through this, it still has the same level of 'scare-the-shit-out-of-me'. I am scared. I have every right to be but I can't show it, I have to be strong for Olive and Devin. All day I just wasn't me so things were not going right. My Mom use to say something to me when I was having a bad day, "Having a bad day is up to you, you can make it a good day, just think possitive" and I have been trying ALL day to change my additude and to try and be happy but the thought of Dr. Feng slicing Olive open and pushing around her organs just makes me sick. I can't get it out of my head.

I am praying for you Olive. I am not sure what I would do without you, it would be a dull world.